Thank God for urination. Without it, I'd get no exercise at all during the day

And then the Lord said,"When you saw only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you.And now my back hurts.Thanks alot"

And then the Lord said,"When you saw only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you.And now my back hurts.Thanks alot"

woodpecker

Last few weeks a woodpecker has been pecking my front shutter sending morse code sounds thru the house. Twice now I dreamt I was recieving a distress call from the Titanic.

one last winter blast

On my drive home last night I went from amused to concerned to freaked out as a few snowflakes turned into a complete white out road covering storm in under 10min. #StLouisWeatherIsBipolar

cameras

I'm going to install security camera inside my house & put a monitor screen outside my front door so potential burglars can verify there's nothing in there worth taking. #SavesEveryoneTime

muppets

Say what you will about the Muppets but I'm yet to see a single news story about any of them in rehab or arrested for domestic abuse. #ThemPuppetsWuzRaisedRight!

I don't care about self-driving or wifi features on new cars. Find me one that does slow motion General Lee jumps & we have a deal